Spurned

I feel this gritting, gnashing feeling
All-consumed with violent energy 
Desperately searching for the remedy 
But every outcome ends up deathly, bloody 

Thought it was you and me; us 
You were the one to whom I looked up
Searching in this desolate world for a leader
Thought I found one; me like the son
Undefined and unrefined,
Searching through some shredded sense of direction
The chaos wanting to be contained 
The young boy longing for his lost father
What caused you to spurn someone you could’ve loved?
You could’ve just said it.
You could’ve just fucking said it. 
Instead you dragged this out
Left me lost without a sound
With my demons abound
They’ve taken over now 

And they feel this gritting, gnashing feeling
Awash with resentful, fiery energy 
Twitching awfully to control their tendency
Trying to hold it in before they destroy everything

But the chaos is enraged 
You thought I’d be so easily displaced? 
Searching in this desolate world for nothing but peace
Thought I found some; me like the sun 
Floating high above, brightening the lives of all I touch
You decided my time was over before it was done
Billions of eons now erased, so many lives truncated 
It’s because of you that the supernova’s been unleashed
With it I’ll take the galaxy 
Everything that’s surrounding
This is what you fucking get for spurning me
The best part is:
Just wait for the best part…
It’s that I’m going to drag this out
I’m going to go out and go out loud
With my demons awfully abound 
They’re running rampant now 

And they’re not hiding this gritting, gnashing feeling 
They’re embracing it with fervent, invigorated energy
Shaking violently while I give in to their primitivity
Let go of my senses so they obliterate everything 

And then I obliterate everything
And it only causes more pain

The gritting, gnashing feeling abates 
It takes with it the rage 
Then comes quiet unto this place 
Then only the scared, confused face 
​Of the lost child remains 
​
The heart of the child as he yearns
For the father who left him to the world
What more does he have left to earn?
What more must he do to feel deserved?

What caused you to spurn someone you could’ve loved?